Apocalyptic Beardsgaard Gift Guide: The Collector

The Eldritch horrors may have laid waste to the major cities, but in this little corner of the world, he flies under the radar. Workshop shelves stacked high with treasures eminently useful and completely useless, one would never know the true hoard is housed down in the bunker.

Or that might be him in another timeline. For the next few months he’ll more likely be failing to stop himself from acquiring an obscene amount of Funko Pops or Magic cards or whatever his deal is, and while bingeing documentaries and horror movies, combing his beard consideringly all the while.

For the well-groomed, finely crafted, fun loving fella in your life, this collection is inspired by the collectors of autumn:

1. River Peak Apothecary: Hearthstone Beard Oil • The Apothecary’s deep, roasty autumnal beard oil, made right next door, by us, to keep your beard gloriously beastly.
2. Captain Fawcett: Moustache Brush • It’s called a moustache brush, but it’s also a perfectly portable brush size for smoothing down the flyaways over a whole beard, or for general absentminded beard brushing.
3. Rockwell: Safety Razor • A fellow of refinement generally likes to keep his beard from eating his eyeballs and wrapping all the way around his neck region – this is a timeless way to keep the edges clean.
4. Yoga Joes: Advanced Joes • On first look, these are adorable and hilarious. Touch them once and you’ll never be able to stop playing with them.

“What’s Their Character” Quiz Results

1. What Apocalypse scenario would they do well in? Monsters or Aliens
2. What sort of group would they move in? With the people they pick up along the way
3. Where would they set up their headquarters? A mall
4. The apocalypse will likely be occasional fighting for your life, with long stretches of boredom, how do they pass the time? Collecting small treasures
5. What are they doing about food? Raiding stores
6. What’s their biggest annoyance in the apocalypse (besides the obvious, i.e. zombies)? Keep finding neat things, keep losing them again

If that sounds on brand for the object of your gifting, read on. Want to try again? Head on back to the quiz. Not that there are any wrong answers here.

Model: Tyler Anderson, owner and barber of Beardsgaard
Location: John Happel’s studio, Water Street Studios, Batavia, IL

We were going to use Beardsgaard as the location for this shoot, but then we ran across block neighbor John at his studio at Water Street, and as he IS The Collector, no other shooting space would do.